Kids Write Jokes! by DiGeorgeL

Champion(s):

KreitzerJ


Runner(s)-Up:

petkunm


Quiz Description

All of these are from the Kids Write Jokes blog... (badkidsjokes.tumblr.com) Here is the disclaimer: I moderate a Kids Jokes website. These are genuine submissions by kids. Many jokes received cannot be published because they don't make any sense or got the joke completely wrong, so I publish them here instead. Can you figure out the completely misguided punchline?

Full Results:

Rank Player Total %ile 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12
Money Value (% Incorrect): 69 99 60 96 82 91 78 91 87 78 82 91
1 KreitzerJ 292 97 00
00
00
00
00
00
15
82
00
00
00
15
87
15
78
00
00
2 petkunm 283 93 15
69
00
00
00
00
00
00
00
00
15
87
00
00
15
82
00
3 ZellwegerS 282 88 15
69
00
15
60
15
00
00
15
78
00
00
00
00
00
15
00
4 VenguswamyK 267 84 15
69
00
15
60
00
00
00
15
15
78
00
00
00
00
00
00
5 ShapiroA 244 79 15
00
00
15
00
00
15
82
00
00
00
15
87
00
15
00
00
6 KnowlesJ 214 75 00
00
15
00
00
15
91
15
78
00
00
00
00
00
00
00
00
7 GaddCAnastasia 196 70 00
00
00
15
60
00
15
00
00
00
00
00
00
00
00
15
91
8 quarterrican 192 65 15
69
00
00
00
00
00
00
00
00
15
78
00
00
00
00
15
9 IrwinK 190 61 00
00
00
00
00
00
00
00
00
00
00
00
15
78
15
82
00
10 cruzich 181 56 00
00
15
60
00
00
00
00
15
91
00
00
00
00
00
00
00
11 Zogtastic 177 52 15
69
00
00
00
00
00
00
00
00
00
00
15
78
00
00
00
12 HassanM 168 43 00
00
15
60
00
00
00
00
00
15
78
00
00
00
00
00
00
12 LuskT 168 43 00
00
00
15
60
00
00
00
00
00
00
00
15
78
00
00
00
12 AdamKing 168 43 00
00
00
00
15
60
00
00
00
00
00
00
00
15
78
00
00
15 WeikleB 97 34 00
00
00
00
00
00
15
82
00
00
00
00
00
00
00
00
00
16 FryedBetaKappa 84 29 15
69
00
00
00
00
00
00
00
00
00
00
00
00
00
00
00
17 JonesRW 15 25 00
00
00
00
00
00
00
00
00
15
00
00
00
00
00
00
00
18 RaiaB 0 11 00
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00
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00
18 JVZ 0 11 00
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00
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18 RoseM 0 11 00
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18 PatschakB 0 11 00
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00
00
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00
18 SteevesR 0 11 00
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00
00
00
00
00
00
00
00
00
00
00
00
00
00

Questions:

What do you call a fish with no legs? (hint: The real joke involves a different body part)

Click to Reveal Answer
A fsh!

What is the capital of Egg? (hint: The city in the answer isn't a capital, but it's an eggselent answer.)

Click to Reveal Answer
York!

Why did the monkey fall out of a tree? (hint: A bird would fall out a tree for the same reason.)

Click to Reveal Answer
Because he was dead!

What do you call fire water fire water fire water fire water fire water? (Hint: The question could continue on indefinitely.)

Click to Reveal Answer
A Pattern!

When does 5 come before 9? (hint: The real joke is a classic. This version is incredibly obvious. Check the book.) (edited at 2:01 pm, May 2, 2016 (EDT))

Click to Reveal Answer
In the Dictionary!

What does a skeleton eat? (hint: An age old adage will help you here.)

Click to Reveal Answer
Bones!

How do you hire a teddy bear? (hint: Homophones are fun.)

Click to Reveal Answer
Put him on stilts! (Derivatives accepted)

How do you wake up Jessie J? (hint: Wrong musician!)

Click to Reveal Answer
Poke Her Face!

What do you call the strongest vegetable? (hint: Not a vegetable, but a different type of food)

Click to Reveal Answer
Mussels!

What did the chicken do when he witnessed a car crash? (hint: You might do the same thing.)

Click to Reveal Answer
Call the Police!

What do you call a middle aged, sad, grey haired woman? (hint: According to studies, 76% of these are women, although not all sad and grey haired.)

Click to Reveal Answer
A Teacher!

What do you call a deer with no eyes, ears, mouth and legs? (Hint: Beats me!) (edited at 2:03 pm, May 2, 2016 (EDT))

Click to Reveal Answer
No I Deer!