To honor Garry Shandling, here are 12 quotes from actual Tonight Show broadcasts when Johnny Carson was not hosting. I will give you a quote and a year, and you name the guest host who said it. Good luck!
| Rank | Player | Total | %ile | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Money Value (% Incorrect): | 25 | 99 | 67 | 59 | 99 | 84 | 25 | 09 | 92 | 92 | 42 | 84 | |||
| 1 | ChrisRosenberg | 293 | 95 |
15 25 |
00 |
00 |
15 59 |
00 00 |
00 |
15 |
00 |
00 |
15 92 |
15 42 |
00 |
| 2 | PolinskyL | 258 | 87 |
15 25 |
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00 |
15 59 |
00 00 |
00 |
15 |
15 |
15 |
00 00 |
00 |
15 84 |
| 3 | Mark | 206 | 79 |
15 25 |
00 |
15 |
00 |
00 00 |
15 |
15 25 |
15 09 |
00 |
00 |
15 42 |
15 |
| 4 | JonesRW | 193 | 70 |
15 25 |
00 |
00 00 |
15 59 |
00 |
00 |
15 25 |
15 09 |
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00 |
15 |
00 |
| 5 | elfm | 176 | 62 |
15 25 |
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00 |
00 |
00 00 |
15 |
15 25 |
15 09 |
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00 |
15 42 |
00 |
| 6 | felsenheldd | 136 | 54 |
15 |
00 00 |
15 67 |
00 00 |
00 00 |
00 |
15 |
15 09 |
00 |
00 |
00 |
00 |
| 7 | ConnorA | 127 | 45 |
00 00 |
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15 |
00 00 |
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15 25 |
15 |
00 |
00 00 |
15 42 |
00 |
| 8 | VenguswamyK | 98 | 37 |
00 |
00 |
00 |
15 59 |
00 00 |
00 |
00 |
15 09 |
00 00 |
00 00 |
00 |
00 |
| 9 | GorowaraR | 94 | 29 |
15 25 |
00 |
15 |
00 00 |
00 |
00 |
00 |
15 09 |
00 |
00 00 |
15 |
00 00 |
| 10 | KMG365 | 79 | 20 |
15 25 |
00 |
00 |
00 00 |
00 00 |
00 |
15 |
15 09 |
00 00 |
00 |
00 |
00 |
| 11 | gabrysiakj | 69 | 12 |
00 |
00 00 |
00 |
15 |
00 00 |
00 |
15 |
15 09 |
00 00 |
00 |
15 |
00 00 |
| 12 | BoyerA | 64 | 4 |
15 25 |
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00 |
00 |
00 00 |
15 09 |
00 00 |
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00 00 |
"Why can't you have a relationship with me that means something! Now I'm standing there and a guy in the crowd says, 'How come you left Mash?'" (1976)
when Ed asks if he can box Jake LaMotta, "Yes, but I don't want to be a character actor, thank you very much!" (1971)
"I've been very busy this week. I've been working on a TV special, have a new record coming out and I really didn't have time to work out a monologue." (1978)
"It's really a great honor for me to be here on The Tonight Show to guest host. You see, what happened is that they ran out of humans. I mean, NBC's had a lot of dogs..." (1979)
"Our next guest ladies and gentleman is a very dear friend and he is the star of the television series C.P.A., or I.R.S., or See-Something Sharky." (1977)
introducing a guest who uses his hands as an instrument: "He takes this unique skill very seriously as he should, and I think you guys should play along too. I know I plan to, whatever the man wants." (1979)
"Of course, you may have noticed that Doc Severinsen is wearing all 12 levels of Super Mario Bros. on his jacket." (1992)
"My friend the tramp Heidi Abramowitz finally got married. She was poster child for herpes. The only bad thing was the bride on the cake was bow-legged. This girl was a tramp, could not keep her legs together."(1982)
"Johnny Carson is on vacation for a change. Last night I did a joke that was not terribly funny and we did offend some of our friends in Mississippi. I'll watch the jokes much more closely the next time and I hope that makes them feel better and if it doesn't, heeeeeyyyyy." (1969)
"Ladies and gentlemen, from the Beatles, John Lennon and Paul McCartney." (1968)
"Ed's brother-in-law got married...we went to Senor Pico's. We threw ourselves on a Mexican hat for half hour...you undressed and went Viva Zapata. Newhart kept saying "I think it's a heck of a night" and started drinking from a lamp...You big fat Irish bum. I don't want to embarrass you but your underwear is starting to rip." (1979)
"You probably think I'm one of the other guest hosts. There's been just a flurry of them since I've been here. I'm not Jay Leno, I'm not Billy Crystal, I'm not Bill Cosby uhh I'm not Betty White--alright I am Betty White." (1986)